I got an insight one afternoon while in the bathroom. It came from a song that sings " I want you as you are not as you ought to be"
While reflecting on those lines, I was asked a question. Don't ask me who asked me. Lol. The question was " If God wants us as we are and not as we ought to be, why then do we humans want our fellow humans the way they ought to be and not as they are?" And you know what? This is one of the major problems we have around the world. Spinsters want Misters as they ought to be and vice versa. Parents want their children as they ought to be and vice versa. Masters and Mistresses want their helps to be as they ought to be and vice versa. Even Teachers want their students as the ought to be and vice versa. Worse still, the church wants it's pastors as they ought to be and vice versa. Hmm.
Now, I need to state that I am not making effort to promote mediocrity. Infact, I hate adamant, rigid, selfish or opinionated attitudes. The point here is the need to see good in others. Seeing them beyond what they are but what they can be.
Let me tell you a story at this point. I remember reading about a mayor's wife who someone was calling out to frantically amidst the crowd while herself and her husband were passing through a neighborhood. Concerned, the husband asked her who the man was. She said " He was my one time boyfriend. The mayor smiled and told her she was lucky that if she had married the man, she wouldn't have been the wife of a mayor today. The wife in all humility smiled and courteously replied her husband saying " if I had married him, he would have been the Mayor and not you". That is what I call a wow and end of discussion statement.
In that kind of situation, the response of the Mayor's wife is the least you would expect someone in her position to say of a one time lover. This can mean that she loved the man as he was/is. Perhaps, she even sees the best in the guy than he sees of himself.
For the sake of balance, It is good sometimes to want people as they out to be. That is, to demand the best from them especially when they are living way below their potential as a result of laziness, low self image and the likes.......
📷= erikjhillphoto & mrlovenstein
I guess I'd be a bit of a hypocrite if I skipped out on participating in World Mental Health Day.
For most of my life, I shut out the people closest to me because I was convinced that helping other people was the best thing I could do. I didn't volunteer information, I asked questions to deflect from having to confront what was going on in my life, and I helped those around me solve their problems at the expense of my own mental health.
As an adult who is now navigating years of unintentional self-sabotage, I've been undoing years of avoiding decisions, keeping the peace rather than expressing my own opinions, and generally keeping a low profile. I've spent too long being emotionless and I can't be that way any more. Needless to say, I feel exactly like Spongebob in the first image, but it's better than feeling nothing.
Two years ago I lost a cousin to suicide. I think about him almost every day. I started a company because of that loss. I was frustrated with how hard it is for people to get the help they need, and I still am. Now at bobbox.co we're selling products to provide counseling services with our pals at heartsupport and it's a start. We're not changing the world, but we are helping change lives, and that's something I am proud of.
As for the last image, I'm sure some of you can relate to being unhappy with yourselves. I spent a lot of time disliking myself for choices I had made, or things that I had said, or stupid stuff I had done. Thanks to seeing a counselor and changing my mindset, I've been able to start being kinder to myself. I may not be beautiful or majestic, but I'm here and I'm trying.
Yeah, I still struggle with depression. Yes, I've been suicidal at times in my life. Yes, I feel like I'm not good enough sometimes (a lot of the time). But that isn't going to stop me from trying to be better.
If you need help, go get it. Don't be afraid to ask. You aren't weak for wanting to be better. You aren't weak for trying to get help. .